First thing is first, i know not a whole lot of people did read Harbingers, for several reasons, some didn’t read it because i made it, and some didn’t read it because it’s accompanied by images from the sims2, and then again some didn’t read it because it’s too disturbing. Personally i am very proud of that story, might seem silly, but i am. So all in all the story is about a man who returns to his hometown, and has to deal with childhood abuse. Something he tried to bury his entire adult life, only to come to the conclusion that he won’t ever be able to deal with it, and ends up shooting everyone, including himself.
I mention this story, because i was thinking about something that was along those lines once more.
So we have a kid who is brought up, tought to fear the world and everyone in it, and that its primary caretakers knows what is best. If you manage to keep a child like that from outside interference, what do you think you’d have? A product of its parents/caretakers twisted mind? I think you would. The severe child abuse newspaper stories I read, it has rarely been the kids who reacted, mostly it’s been someone from outside, like a neighbor or a taxi driver or the school. And in most of those stories i read, there the children tries to cover for their parents a very long way down the road. Untill someone gets through to them and tells them that it’s not normal what they experienced.
So what if it had its chance to run full circle? then what? Would it be like i claimed in Harbingers, that this child would never be able to exist as adult, forever locked in their childhood trauma, unable to move past it.
Now the story i was thinking of was not a story like Harbingers, it’s not even remotely about sexual abuse. It is however about a child murderer and his apprentice. What fasinates me is the fine line between abuser and victim. I mean when do you stop being a victim and start being an abuser? (If we say that they follow the footsteps of their “teacher”) Is it possible to be both? So are you a victim till you make a consious decision to harm? I mean that it’s a thought that comes from you, and not something you are promted to do. And does that thought really come from you then? Or does it come from years of coaching by some very twisted indivduals?
I have to give this some thought.